99% of the self proclaimed nice guys out there aren’t really nice – they’re just pretending to be nice to earn brownie points from you. But then how do you distinguish between a genuinely good guy and a dude who simply pretend to be nice? Well, here are 10 signs that you should keep an eye out for!
10 Signs He's a Douchebag
He always has an excuse for his poor behavior
Whenever you berate him for taking out his frustrations on you, it’s never his fault for behaving the way that he does. It’s always someone else’s fault for creating conditions for him which force him to behave like a dick to you. Most common examples include: work overload, dick boss/employees/clients, family or financial troubles, or something related to his ex.
Bottom line: If he’s incapable of owning up his own shit, he’s a douchebag.
When things don’t go his way, he doesn’t hesitate to show his displeasure
Be it throwing a tantrum, creating a fuss, shouting at you or even getting physical – he doesn’t think twice before acting like the child that he is when life isn’t kind to him. As a bonus, he’s always a victim of his circumstances and it’s never his fault that things may not have worked in his favor.
If you’re in a relationship with him, you’ll notice that he ends up blaming you for everything wrong in his life.
He loves talking, but not listening
This is one of the most important among the 10 signs he's a douchebag.
Everything is about him – his life, his accomplishments, his wants, his dislikes and everything that exists in his tiny little world. You like to listen to him, sure, but he should listen to you every once in a while too, right? Especially when you’re venting your problems to him. But nope – he finds some way or the other to steer the spot light on him and then continues as if nothing ever happened. Or it could be that...
He listens to you, but doesn’t bother
You’ll vent, he’ll listen. He may even be sympathetic, but if a few days down the road you remind him of that little conversation you had, he’ll draw a blank. Why? Because he doesn’t remember. I mean, sure, he could be a forgetful person and what not, but if he wants to take an interest in you, shouldn’t he make more of an effort to remember stuff important to you?
He’s nice to you, but…
He’s a dick to everybody else. Which makes you wonder – why is he nice just to you? What’s so special about you? The answer is: Nothing. He’s behaving like this in front of you because he expects sex from you, and the moment he realizes he isn’t gonna get it, is the moment you’ll get to see his true colors.
Don’t believe me? Try it. Tell him you’re interested in being “just friends” and then see how his behavior towards you does a complete 180. Then you will have zero doubt about him displaying one among the 10 signs he's a douchebag.
Eye contact during sex is rare, if at all
Because sex for him is nothing more than sex, despite what he may have led you to believe. And that’s not all – it’s all about him and his pleasures. You spend more time making him happy than he does for you – if at all he focuses on your pleasure areas.
You never know until the last moment whether he’s free or not
Whatever the plans made in advance by you, they are never confirmed (or rejected) by him till the very last moment. “Work” is the excuse that he always gives you, and since it’s not something he’s at fault for, you always give him a pass. However, do think of the following possibilities:
He puts you on hold and waits for better opportunities to arise
He’s waiting for another girl to say no to him, before he says yes to you
He hangs out with you because he has nothing better to do
He has had a “terrible” past
And he always holds this carrot over your head as an excuse for being a dick or being emotionally unavailable. Could be family or financial issues, drug additions or even physical abuse – but you don’t know because he is never willing to discuss it with you. This alone isn’t enough to qualify him as a douchebag (although blaming the past for his present dick-self is a dick move). However, if he’s showing one or more of the 10 signs he's a douchebag that I’ve mentioned, then beware!
You’ve noticed a change in his behavior
He’s not the sweet, gentle and good guy that you were initially attracted to. And that’s because when he wanted to have sex with you, he tried every trick in the book to get you. However, now that he’s got what he’s wanted, he’s slowly become more comfortable in showing you the real him – and that ain’t a pretty picture.
His compliments are insults in disguise
“That’s a nice red lipstick you have on. Too bad it makes your teeth look yellow.”
“Cute dress, but it emphasizes all the wrong curves.”
“You’re pretty smart, for a woman.”
“You look good with makeup on. You should wear it more often.”
See what I mean? This is nothing but his way of belittling you and denting your self-esteem in order to show you your “place” in the relationship.