When it comes to marriage, you definitely have to give up a few things. As soon as you say "I do", there are some things that change. Say goodbye to singlehood! But when you’re with the right person, it’s okay. You won’t miss that part of your old life, anyway.
But are there some things you shouldn’t give up in marriage? Yes, of course. While marriage is a lifelong compromise of decisions, big and small, and learning to fit your lives together, there are some things that you shouldn’t have to give up. Here are 7 things you shouldn’t sacrifice in marriage.
7 Things You Shouldn't Sacrifice In a Marriage
Who You Are Inside and Out
Your spouse married YOU—warts and all. Sure, you both inspire each other to be better people, and you both strive everyday to do just that. But when you get married, you marry an imperfect person who has faults, and also an amazing person who has great potentials. Don’t forget about your spouse, and don’t let them forget about you. Your marriage should allow you to continue to be who you really are.
All Your Dreams—Big and Small
Maybe being married to your soul mate has always been a dream of yours. But it doesn’t mean when you say I do, your other dreams cease to exist. Whether you want to start a business or run a marathon, your spouse should give you the space to do it and cheer you on.
Being married means being vulnerable. You share your lives together, including the successes and the failures. Your spouse will see you at your best and at your worst. But none of it will be right if you don’t feel safe with the one you love. Your spouse should never discount your fears or harm you emotionally, verbally, or physically. You should never sacrifice your safety in marriage. If you feel unsafe, talk to someone who can help you right away.
Your Highest Morals and Ideals
Many people marry those who share a lot of same ideals and life goals. But there will always be some things you don’t agree on. Just remember that being married doesn’t mean you should sacrifice your personal beliefs, be it religious or spiritual or otherwise. Hold onto your morals and make sure you and your spouse respect the other in this regard.
Your Personal Belongings
Being married means you share a lot of things, like the house, car, bank account, and TV remote. But just because you are married doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have things that are just yours and yours alone. The key is to talk about it and make sure you are both clear on what is important that it should only belong to you—obviously your toothbrush, but perhaps heirlooms, gifts from specific people, or items that relate to your hobby. Try to be a little flexible on certain comfy clothing items and chocolatey treats.
Your Friends and Family
While some of your close relationship may change a little when you get married, you should definitely be able to maintain them at an appropriate level throughout your married life. While your spouse is your priority, you shouldn’t give up spending time with family, especially during holidays and at other times when they need you the most. Just make sure to talk about boundaries and what you both feel comfortable with. Same goes with friends. Maybe an evening out once in a while with the girls or guys will fill your needs; it can take a little extra effort after marriage in order to do this.
Marriage should be a journey to greater happiness, not a path away from it. Never sacrifice your happiness in marriage. While challenges will come your way as a single person or as a married person, there is a difference between being happy despite the ups and downs of life, and being unhappy. With your spouse you should buoy each other up, give to each other, show love to each other, and figure out and provide what makes the other person happy. That is what a good marriage is all about. Never sacrifice happiness.