Even though we’ve progressed collectively as a society, we are still stuck in certain old and outdated societal beliefs even today. And one of the worst beliefs that people today are exposed to is that men should be tough, macho and manly and that crying is best left to women. Even though, you know, psychology has proven that keeping your emotions inside you is not only unhealthy but also can prove to be medically disastrous for your mental health in the future. But, whatever, men gotta protect their egos, you know. This is exactly why helping men deal with breakups is very different.

How Guys Deal With Breakups

Let me begin by saying that every guy is unique and has his unique way of dealing with heartache. Nonetheless, here’s a general classification of how men usually behave when heartbroken:

They don’t tend to over analyze things

I know it might come off as sexist, but the truth remains that women are conditioned to be emotional beings while men are forced to take on the more stoic roles. And this reflects best in how their deal with breakups. Women obsess over the littlest of things, like what they should have said, what shouldn’t have said, their last conversation, their last kiss, etc. In contrast, men don’t bother with such details. For them, if it’s over, it’s over. Sure they will think about the good times and how they could have done things differently, but they seldom over analyze things the way women do.


They stop caring about themselves

I know, both sexes do the same. But women get out of this quicker because society ties a woman's look and life style directly with her self-worth, which forces her to drag her life back to track, at least maintaining the usually routine of taking care of herself physically. But men care less about their looks or lifestyle, and focus more on their career and salaries. So when heartbroken, they tend to neglect self-care, act like working machine or treat themselves like rubbish. They grow beards, their houses become dirtier, they stop taking showers and basically they live like hobos. It’s literally how guys deal with breakups.


But they maintain a stoic façade

They tend to bottle up their emotions. Because society, manliness, machismo et al.


Male company sometimes sucks

Female friends are always there for you when you break up to ask what happened, tell you how bad that ex of yours was, listen to all your nagging and complaining patiently, comfort you gently and what not. Men are there too, but only on a superficial level. They seldom want to discuss what you’re actually going through because real men never do that weak thing. They would rather take you to a strip club or bar and provide temporary solace. Or they may shout at you or even punch you to let you man up.


They’re pressured to “get over her already”

Because again, machismo. Men are supposed to be strong and are supposed to “get over that woman” because there are “plenty of fish in the sea and men are born to be predator not loser”. This pressurizes a high number of men into getting over someone impossibly quickly and needless to say, that's unhealthy.


They get into rebound relationships

You shouldn’t get into any relationship just to show everybody how strong you are to be able to get over your ex so quickly. But you do it anyway, don’t you? And we all know how such relationships end. Sometimes, men rebound with pretty women just as a boost to their ego. But then again, this is a temporary solution to a much deeper problem. Sadly, the thing about how guys deal with breakups is that they just can't grasp the concept that healing takes time, for both the sexes. And it's normal, not shameful.


They cry

Oh yes, they do, especially if they were in love and were the ones dumped by their partners. Of course, most people even their friends and family don’t get to see those tears because even today, tears are seen as a sign of weakness among men, as opposed to, you know, a health venting of one's emotional turmoil.


They turn sadness into anger and aggression

I mean, it’s great if you’re channeling this energy into, you know, winning a competition, finishing a project or beating a bully. But if you’re bottling your emotions by being furious just for the sake of getting over her quickly, guess how that ends! Answer: not well. You may end up hurting yourself or those close to you and make your life a total mess.


They often turn to alcohol

How guys deal with breakup? This is one major way most men turn to. When men are under so much pressure to get over their exes quickly, to be strong and to be a “man”, they often look for support at the bottom of a glass bottle. They think that much like rebound relationships, alcohol can numb their pain or make them forget what happened completely. Even worse, some may turn to substances to get some relief. But we all know that’s not true and those things can make you become addicted, which never lead to anything good.


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