While every relationship has its ups and downs, there are many that have a lot more downs than ups.
And while it’s seldom the fault of one person in the relationship, it’s not a stretch to say that one person is usually more responsible for creating tension than the other. And if you believe you’ve done a lot of shit that might make your girl leave you, then here’s how to make your girlfriend not leave you.
How to Make Your Girlfriend Not Leave You
Get a different POV
A fresh perspective can be a God send when you both are emotionally charged people whose arguments end up horribly. Take the help of a friend, family member, therapist or even a friend of your partner’s. Explain the situation to them and let them offer their own insights into the situation. An unbiased third party POV will definitely help you pinpoint the problem in your relationship.
Don’t always give in
Especially if she has a bad temper. Always caving in first and apologizing (even when it’s not your fault) is not a good sign for your relationship, or her. You’re teaching her that she’s always right, that she’s perfect and that whatever she says is law. No. Put your foot down from time to time and show her how her behavior is wrong.
I mean, there is only so much groveling you can do before she starts getting tired of a “spineless” man like you, right?
Learn to bow down
The #1 way on how to make your girlfriend not leave you is to seldom let your ego come in between. If you expect her to come crawling back to you every time you have a fight, think again. Every person has a limit to their love and patience, and the more you push her, the sooner she’ll end up dumping you.
Plus, if you always put your ego first and your relationship second, maybe you aren’t really mature enough to be in a committed relationship.
Space is important
Especially after you two have fought. Let 1-2 days go by before you make a move. She too will have calmed down by that time, and you two are more likely to have a less emotional and more adult conversation with each other.
Make her feel special. Doesn’t take much of an effort, you know. And here are two very important things to keep in mind:
Be genuine when you compliment her – she’s not a fool and she’ll see through your fake compliments in a jiffy.
Compliment her on stuff that doesn’t involve her appearance. Like thanking her for all the jobs she does around the house that you take granted for.
Change…but not because she wants you to
How to make your girlfriend not leave you? You make the improvements she wants to see in you...and do it because it makes you a better person. Not because she told you to do so. What’s worse is dangling this change in you over her head every time you get into an argument. Picture this:
Her: You’re a terrible guy
You: Yeah well this terrible guy gave up smoking for you. Howzzat?
I’ll tell you “howzzat” – it’s fucking immature. You’re not doing her any favor by giving up smoking, and if you can’t understand this simple fact then she definitely is better off leaving your sorry ass behind. So the next time she walks up to you and hints that certain negative things about you, your lifestyle or personality need to be changed, don’t become defensive. Listen to her with an open mind, ask her what truly bothers her and then make that change (aka improvement) in your life.
Be there for her
And I don’t mean just physically – I mean emotionally as well. When she comes to you with a problem that she wants you to solve, or simply wants to vent to you, don’t be like “Ah, here comes the waterworks”. If you can’t handle a woman’s emotional duress then you’re better off being single.
She comes to you because she wants you to be a part of her life as well. So be that part. Listen to her. Even if you have no words of consolation to offer to her, you’ve already made her happy by just being there for her.
SAY that you care
How to make your girlfriend not leave you? Well…
You remember that one time you went to the gym, lost a couple of pounds and looked real good? And you remember how all those compliments made you feel? So the next time she makes an effort for you or your relationship, say it out loud that you care for her and appreciate everything she does. And no, it’s not something that’s a given in a relationship and needn’t be addressed. You put effort into losing weight and wanted validation, despite your change being a given, right?
The same principle applies here. If you love her, then say so. If you’re thankful for something she does, then say it. Appreciate her work, make her feel loved and wanted. Sometimes, do it for no apparent reason. Say “I’m so lucky I found you” or text her a simple “I miss you!”. You will instantly brighten up her day.
Make her feel beautiful
We women live in a society that tells us 24x7 that we’re not good enough – we’re not pretty enough, we’re not sexy enough, we’re not thin enough, we’re not sweet enough, we’re not ladylike enough and all that jazz. So here’s the thing – go ahead and tell her she’s cute when she’s wearing you oversized hoodie at home. Tell her she’s pretty when she’s wearing no makeup on, and tell her she looks as sexy in her flip flops as she does when she wears those sexy black heels of hers.