If you ask any successfully married couple, they would tell that the secret of success in marriage is not just love. You might have come across a number of questions on marriage and other issues in marriage forums. When you ask them if they’d discussed these issues before marriage, the answer is probably "no". There are some deal-breaking issues which need to be addressed immediately, not compromised upon. If you are married, discuss these issues right now. If not, then you must prepare a list of questions to ask and discuss with your partner before marriage.
Questions To Ask Before Marriage
How did your family react while disagreements? Did they throw plates or reach an amicable solution?
This question will provide a deeper understanding about your partner’s reaction during arguments or fights. You can get to know whether he would follow his family’s pattern of arguing or silently shutting it down without making any fuss.
Will you help me out if I am in debt?
Nowadays, it’s really crucial to discuss financial issues with your partner. You need to tell them every detail about your financial sufficiency and chart out a plan together to help each other in times of financial crisis.
Can I be independent and do things without you?
Everyone needs some privacy. You have to give your partner the space he or she deserves. Discuss in prior about your hobbies and your routine of meeting friends. This is one of the important questions to ask before marriage.
Would you consider sex as a important thing?
Sex is actually a part and parcel of every married couple’s life. You need to compulsorily have a discussion regarding sex – how often to do it, what are the comfortable positions and what interesting things you can try out in bed.
Do we genuinely like each other’s parents?
Another important query as a part of questions to ask before marriage. In order to enjoy married life, you need to have a congenial relationship with your in-laws and try to immediately arrive at a solution if issues arise with them.
When can we have children? Will you take part in caring for the child?
It’s the responsibility of both parents to take care of their children in turns. Before marriage, couples should definitely discuss about having children and their respective roles in rearing and looking after them.
How much would you spend on a car, a pair of shoes or a couch?
Couples should seriously discuss about how much they would be able to spend on the things that are essential. They should also sort out financial recklessness or overspending on things that aren’t much important for their lifestyle.
Are you okay with occasional flirting and watching porn?
At first this question might seem to be unimportant in the list of questions to ask before marriage. But your partner’s addiction to porn or flirting with others can be a put off for you.
Where do you see us 10 years from now?
Discussing your ambitions and long-time goals with your partner is really essential. By this way, you can get to know each other better and work towards the goals together. You can also set some relationship goals to excel at personal level.
What do you admire in me and what annoys you?
This is another priority for all couples. It is important to discuss what your partner likes about you and what are their pet peeves. Remember, it is not about clicking together, but about respecting each other.
How important is religion to you? Would you respect my religious views?
This should be topmost on your list of questions to ask before marriage if you two hail from different religious backgrounds. Respecting each other’s religious views and religious celebrations should be considered as something very important.
Will our experiences with our exes affect our relationship?
A most unnerving issue that needs to be addressed. Your partner can turn jealous when you compare him or her (even unintentionally) with your exes. This can be avoided if you have a discussion on this and accept each other’s previous love life.
Would you acknowledge the different ways I say "I love you"?
Telling "I love you" isn’t the only way to express your love for each other. There are other ways too – giving gifts, surprising each other with kisses, going on dinners, etc. You should make sure that your partner is acknowledging your love.
Will you make effort to keep the sparks flying in our relationship?
Most marriages fail because the spark in the relationship dies sooner than imagined. Hence, discuss with your partner about the various ways to keep your romance alive and ask whether him or her would stick to the promise.
Would you put us ahead of everything else?
More than anything else in the world, it is you and your partner who matter the most to each other. You should be able to fulfill each other’s desires and strive towards keeping each other happy.
Will you support me when I can’t support myself?
Whether your partner would stick to you during crisis and help you come out of your depression is one of the biggest questions to ask before marriage.
Would you promise to pursue your goals even after marriage?
Being married doesn’t mean that you should completely change yourself and abandon your dreams and goals. Hence, make your partner promise you that his or her ambitions are as important as yours and you two must achieve your goals wholeheartedly.
More questions to ask before marriage
How will you teach our kids discipline?
If we don’t have kids, would you be willing to adopt?
Where do you want our child to study – in private or public school?
Would you ever broach the topic of divorce?
Will you say "yes" to counseling if we have marital discords?
Would you help me out with the household chores?
Will you allow me to have a say in household decisions?
Would you give equal preference to both work and family?
Will you save money for our life after retirement?
Will you spend some quality time alone with me?
Would you say "yes" for a vacation in a year?
If I want to have a pet, would you allow me to have one?
Would you be interested in trying unique things while having sex?
How long a gap should we leave before having the second kid?
Would you scold or beat our child?
Would you open up if something is bothering you?
Would you consider moving to a better job if a financial crisis occurs?
What if a friend wants to borrow a huge sum of money?
Would you allow my parents to visit us?
Can you relocate along with me for my job?
Would you exercise with me for improving our health?
Would you take turns in cooking?
What do you think about infidelity?
Would you mind telling me about your biggest fear in marriage?