Now, let’s define a girlfriend – if it means having a one-night stand after hooking up at some club, you’d better look for other advice. If you are seriously concerned about starting out a relationship but fail to take it beyond the first date, read on to find out more about the possible answers to your question why can’t I get a girlfriend? It’s not necessarily intended as your eye-opener, but next time you go out, take into account this handy information.
Top 12 Reasons Why You Can’t Get a Girlfriend
You don’t look after yourself
We all judge people by their looks, and only after that comes the stage when we get closer to actually knowing the other person. If you wear baggy clothes, don’t have a proper diet and a gym membership, probably it’s the right time to consider changing your habits. Look for your role models up in men’s magazines and adopt their looks to start with and then develop them according to your own characteristics.
You’re still living with your mom
No one likes mummy’s boys who are still dependent on their parents and are afraid to start their own adult life, separately from their family’s nest. If you are one of those 30-something guys who have never rented their own apartment, where are you going to invite your girl to stay the night with you? So if you’re still asking yourself why can’t I get a girlfriend, this may be one of the most obvious reasons.
You look in all the wrong places
We know it’s tough to juggle your full-time job and rich social life, but it’s rare that people get along at their workplaces. If there are no female colleagues you’re up to, make an effort to go out in a decent, respectable place like a fine dining restaurant or a fashionable art gallery.
If sex-based prejudices and chauvinistic views start to pour out of your mouth the moment you open it, well – you’d better keep it shut. Don’t hold any narrow views about women, especially when you have no factual support for your claims. It’s no good to abuse, albeit verbally, the girl you’re spending the evening with. The worst part of this attitude is also in word of mouth that can quickly spread the news about you among the girls in your immediate location.
You don’t love yourself
How can anyone love you back when you’re plunging into self-pity? If you have never oozed any air of confidence and adequate self-esteem, she will have nothing to hold on to. We are not going to list all the techniques for you to build up a healthy attitude to yourself, but just bear in mind that this can be one of the directions to look to.
You love yourself too much
Another side of the coin is that you may love yourself too much, spending the entire evening talking about your persona or flaunting your high-flyer lifestyle. If you don’t leave any opportunity for your vis-à-vis to share her own story or respond to your showing off with a knock-out comment, you are unlikely to attract anyone expect a desperate man-hunter who’s up for anyone with a penis.
You openly brag about polygamy
Another answer to your question of why can’t I get a girlfriend is that you don’t accept only one girlfriend at a time, and you eagerly let everyone know about it. Hold up your confessions till you’re confident she agrees with you on this point. If she’s not, or you don’t know yet, there’s nothing more despising than your saying that you are going to switch to any other woman at any moment with no remorse. So watch out for this.
You’re awkward at conversations
In some sense, we are all trying to sell ourselves when it comes to getting a girlfriend or a boyfriend. If you can’t present yourself properly, there’s no chance you will ‘close the deal’. Train your language skills and support them with working out your self-confidence. There’s nothing wrong about coming up with a few clever pitches that will help you to get started.
You scream about your loneliness
Even if you have never had a girlfriend, don’t scream about how desperate you are to get one. You should come up as a self-sufficient person, for whom dating someone is an act of a deliberate choice, not despair or necessity. And of course, don’t hook up with anyone in your radius just because it’s a girl. She will appreciate it more when you make clear she is truly special for you.
You’re pushing too far
One of the most widespread reasons for a girl to run as far away as they can from a guy is to avoid harassment. When she’s not ready to get to a higher level of intimacy with you, don’t press. It’s important to let her do her own choice even when you’re dying to get into her pants. If you insist on intimacy too early, don’t ask why can’t I get a girlfriend any longer.
You can’t figure out your type of girls
Compare your characteristics, social status and ambitions with those of the girl you’re looking for. Surely, you have some picture in your head, but is it adequate? It’s helpful to analyze your past relationships, if any, and plan ahead. Imagine the girl you would like to comfortably spend the rest of your life with, and go for it! If you are looking for the right one, your search is bound to bring you more satisfaction in the end.
You’re still waiting for your princess
What’s true about girls waiting for their knight to come, can also apply to men. If you are dying to meet your ideal but avoid killing your time on those who don’t meet your high standards, it’s one of the surest ways to end up all alone. Consider lowering your bar to let in more options in your view of the world, and don’t get desperate about every inconsistency with your image of the perfect girl.